Dear LAGOS, what you need to know about keeping healthy friendships & letting go of toxic ones!

Lagos traffic is tough, PHCN can shock you at any time, and the price of jollof rice at your favorite buka keeps climbing. In the middle of all that chaos, there’s one thing that keeps us sane, FRIENDS! The right kind of friends are like Wi-Fi when the connection is strong, everything feels better. But when it’s weak or toxic, you just want to turn it off and walk away.

Friendships are not just about laughs, selfies, and group chats filled with memes. They’re a mental health booster. Good friends help you stay grounded, reduce stress, and remind you of your worth when life feels overwhelming. But healthy friendships don’t just happen by accident they require care, effort, and sometimes tough decisions.

How to Keep Healthy Friendships.
ℹ️ Communicate openly and honestly
Silence may be golden, but in friendships, it can be dangerous. Say how you feel, set the record straight, and avoid those silent battles that only breed misunderstandings.

ℹ️ Show appreciation
Friendship is not an ATM where you only withdraw when you need help. Say “thank you,” drop compliments, and spend quality time together, even if it’s just gisting over suya.

ℹ️ Be a good, active listener
Sometimes your friend doesn’t need advice, they just need you to hear them out without scrolling Instagram in the background. Listening shows you value their feelings.

ℹ️ Make time for your friends
Life is busy, but even short calls, voice notes, or a “just checking on you” text goes a long way. Don’t wait until birthdays to prove you remember they exist.

ℹ️ Offer consistent support
Good friends show up not only at weddings and owambes, but also during breakups, job hunts, or tough seasons. Support is the true currency of friendship.

ℹ️ Set and respect boundaries
Yes, even best friends need limits. Boundaries protect both of you from burnout, overdependence, or unnecessary wahala.

ℹ️ Be flexible
Life changes. Jobs, marriages, relocations, and babies can shift dynamics. Flexibility allows friendships to grow instead of break under pressure.

How to End a Bad Friendship Intelligently.
Not every “day one” should still be in your life today. Some friendships expire, and that’s okay. Ending a toxic friendship doesn’t make you wicked, it makes you wise. Here’s how to do it without unnecessary drama:

ℹ️ Recognize the red flags
If your “friend” constantly criticizes you, lies, competes with you, or drains your energy more than Lagos traffic, it may be time to move on.

ℹ️ Make the decision maturely
Understand that letting go is self-care. You’re not heartless; you’re protecting your peace.

ℹ️ Communicate respectfully
If possible, have a calm conversation. Don’t end a 5-year friendship with a WhatsApp blue tick.

ℹ️ Explain your reasons kindly
Be honest, but gentle. “This friendship no longer serves me” sounds better than “You’re the problem.”

ℹ️ Create distance
After the conversation, give both sides space to heal. Don’t keep engaging in passive-aggressive posts or late-night rants about them.

Healthy friendships can reduce stress, boost joy, and help you navigate life’s toughest challenges. But unhealthy ones can drain your mental health faster than NEPA can cut light. Learn to invest in the good, and wisely walk away from the bad.

Because at the end of the day, true friendship isn’t about proximity, it’s about positivity. And that, dear reader, is the kind of energy your mental health deserves.