By On Tuesday, Abike did the unthinkable. She said NO.
Not “let me think about it,” not “I’ll get back to you,” not “maybe,” but a full-bodied, chest-out, vocal-cords-blessed “NO” after work, without apology or prayer point.
The second miracle happened on Tuesday Night. Fẹmi, the unofficial chairman of Emotional Parasites International, texted:
“Abike, can I crash at your place for a few days? I just need to clear my head.”
Now mind you, Fẹmi has been “clearing his head” in people’s homes since Buhari was in power. The only thing he’s never cleared is NEPA bills.
But Abike, the formerly certified Chief Minister of the “Fix Them Before Fixing Yourself” Department, simply replied:
“Sorry, I am incapacitated, Try God or a guest house.”
Power, Peace!
That text alone added five years to her lifespan and removed the stubborn forehead pimple that had been refusing to relocate.
Let’s get to the Real Gist; You see, Abike used to be the type that would:
✅Babysit someone else’s emotional crisis while hers was crying for feeding bottle.
✅Rewrite work reports for a colleague who “forgot” it was due.
✅Attend birthday parties she didn’t feel like just to keep up appearances only to spend the next day drained and googling “how to disappear respectfully.”
But something shifted.
It started with a panic attack in the BRT, then a therapist’s honest line:
“You are not wicked. You are just tired of self-abandonment disguised as compassion.”
Guess what became Abike’s Turning Point?
The final straw came when her supposed “bestie” Funmi asked her to lend her 800k for a “business” that sounded suspiciously like MMM’s resurrection. When Abike hesitated, Funmi called her stingy and selfish.
Instead of tears, Abike laughed. A deep belly Lagos Auntie laugh.
“Funmi, please, if I was selfish, I wouldn’t even pick your call. Let’s not confuse boundaries with wickedness. My therapist will hear of this, and you…you will be blocked.”
Did you learn any lesson from Stories with Abike?
In a world where being too nice often feels like the only way to keep friendships, Abike chose peace over performance.
She discovered:
✅Saying “No” is not wickedness. It’s strength & wellness.
✅Boundaries don’t burn bridges, they build fences that keep out mosquitoes.
✅If your absence feels like betrayal to someone, then your presence was probably their convenience.
A Word to Your Mental Health:
This week, before you say “yes” to that request, ask:
✅Is this adding to me or subtracting from me?
✅Will I resent this later?
✅Am I choosing them over me again?
Dear reader, like Abike, resign from the Ministry of People Pleasing. You don’t need a dramatic press release, just a quiet, consistent “No” and a daily reminder:
“I am not a rehab for emotionally unavailable, ungrateful, and entitled humans. I choose me and I’m not sorry.”
Prioritize your Mental Health and Peace of Mind!